Noobs of Noobcraft
by Invader Derp
Summary: When Ms. Bitters teaches a lesson about the dangers of the internet, Zim thinks of his next evil plan to destroy Dib.
1. The Noobening

**A/N: So it's time for my first multiple chapter story that isn't just a collection of oneshots I think up. If you want to see those though then read "Dark and Insane Adventures with Zim and Others." But anyway yeah. So yeah I thought up a story where Zim tried to trick Dib online. I'll let you read it before I spoil to much of the plot.**

 **Also please review, I REALLY, REALLY, appreaciate feedback, and if you liked the story I'd reccomend following it, its you desicion though. Anyway I hope you enjoy this fanfiction, by the way if your reading this before the 2nd or other chapters have come out don't worry, more chapters are coming soon.**

 **Now onto the story.**

 **Now Invader Derp Productions Persents  
"Noobs of Noobcraft"  
(REMEMBER TO BE QUIET AND NO TEXTING YOU DUMBIES!)**

Another boring day at Doomsville Middle Skool. A place where you here Ms. Bitters always rant about some topic. Zim was playing with his pencil. He really didn't need to contribute to skool. Mean he'd leave the planet in a time from a couple of months (And considering he's Zim very unlikely) to maybe a few years (Heck that's still unlikely). The reason he was there was to be normal, not to be successful.

"And that class is why you should never take selfies." Ms. Bitters concluded. She erased the chalkboard and Dib raised his hand.

"Ms. Bitters your point that selfies can make your eyes blind is completely false and-"

Ms. Bitters grinded her teeth, "Dib stop being a smart alleck. Anyway class now that media is a thing," she cursed it under her breath because she didn't want to talk about it, "we're required to talk to you about the dangers of it."

Zim raised his hand "You know Ms. Bitters? I wondered... where is Brian."

 _At Some Random Dude's House_

"HELP ME!" Brian yelled.

"Thank you for telling me your adress on that website little boy." said the man.

 _Back at the Skool_

"I have abesolute no idea." Ms. Bitters said, "Now class if anyone online asks anything personal about you, don't tell them. Or else they'll- uh how do I explain this in a kid friendly way? Um they want to romantically hurt you." She said.

"Wait wouldn't that be a r-"

Ms. Bitters covered Dib's mouth "The Principal will fire me if you say that," Ms. Bitters said, "so class remember to not do that stuff." Then the doorbell rang, "Walk, walk my miserable students."

Gaz was on her smartphone checking out a website for a game. "Aw man I can't wait for this game!" Gaz said.

"Hey Gaz whatcha doing?" Dib said as he walked up to her locker.

"I'm checking out the preview for an MMORPG that's expecting to be pretty good." Gaz said.

"What is it called?" asked Dib.

"Noobs of Noobcraft." she said.

"Cool I might download that." Dib said.

"Why? Don't you have some reason to stalk Zim for his plans to talk over Earth, that'll obviously fail." she asked.

"Meh he doesn't seem to be doing anything at the moment." Zim licked his hand and sniffed it quickly he then sticked his tounge out and did a "Bleh!" "Besides can't Earth's greatest defender take a break every once in a while?" Dib said.

"I don't care really Dib." she said.

Over at Zim he heard a detector sound from his "Ease-Dropping Device." "Huh what is it!?" Zim yelled. The computer showed that he could use the information Ms. Bitters said in class and learn more about Dib and use this game called "Noobs of Noobcraft." "That's good device. You've done good work today!"

 _Zim's Base_

"DOBEDOBEDOBEDOBE!" Gir went as Zim walked through the door.

"GIR BE QUIET I HAVE TO DO A MISSION! I NEED TO CONCENTRATE!" Zim said.

"Dobedobedobedo..." Gir said.

"Meh it's better then yelling." Zim said, he then went down to the lab, "Using this game I can ask Dib all the things I'll need to know in order to DESTROY HIM! MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH-" Zim then coughed, "That always has to happen to an evil laugh!"

As Zim went downstairs he went to the computer, "COMPUTER! Download program with files 20198810 or, 'Noobs of Noobcraft'." Zim said.

"Download processing... breep... boop... jerk... download complete." the Computer went.

"Excellent... MUHAHAHAHAHAHAH- wait I'm not falling for that laugh again throat!" Zim then punched it, "OWWW!"

 **To be continued unless you've read this after I published the second chapter in that case just go on OK bye!**


	2. The Plan

**A/** **N: Now** **it's time to get interesting. It's about time we start Zim perverting, wow that sounded MUCH more innocent in my mind. Oh and also you might've noticed the new "Romance" genre. I'll let you guys guess until you get to it, what you think I was gonna spoil it and back off readers? NOPE SO YOU LOSE!**

 **Make sure to review, and if you like it, follow it! I'll make it for you to decide if you wanna fav or not, and again please review I really, like to see the thoughts of more people than "Zim'sMostLoyalServant" and "Invader Johnny." No offense to you guys your pretty cool critics and writers.**

 **Now onto the story.**

 **Now Invader Derp Productions Persents**

 **"Noobs of Noobcraft, Part 2"**

 **(NO TEXTING OR TALKING IN THE READING THEATER!)**

Now that Zim had downloaded the game he could now trick Dib into his will and he had the perfect plan, he grabbed his voice sympathizer and set it too "Robotic Preteen Female."

"EXCELLENT! Oh man is that high pitched. I sound like a mouse of some sort." Zim said. "Now!" He jumped onto his chair. And opened up NoN. Then "Username and Password" came up. "WHAT! WHAT IS THIS USERNAME AND PASSWORD THING!"

The computer sighed. "Let me hack into it." The computer said, he really didn't hack it though, he just went to the website and signed up.

"That's genius computer! Why didn't I think of that!" Zim said.

"Your kinda stupid." The computer said under its breath.

"WHAT DID YOU SAY BOLTS AND um..."

"Point proven." The computer said.

 _Dib's House and Such_

"Now I'll play that cool new game on my computer! Why am talking to myself all the time! I don't know!" Dib said. Then he signed up and once he made his avatar, he was transported into a log house. Where he met a female blonde avatar. "Um hey do you know where the quests are?" Dib asked.

"Oh I don't know? I'm just still a dumb and incompetent human like you are." she said. **(If you didn't get the point yet, it's Zim's avatar.)**

"I'm not dumb." Dib said with a smile with his eyes closed.

"YES YOU ARE!" Gaz yelled from the living room.

"HOW DID YOU KNOW I SAID THAT!" Dib yelled.

"I GOT CAMERAS!"

"What's going on smart, um... normal sized headed, um... sane and not a freak person." Zim said.

"Um... thanks! My sister is just crapping with me." Dib said, "So-" A party invite from Zim's avatar appeared on Dib screen. "Of course..."

Zim was flipping through fake female appropriate names. "Grenda." Zim said.

"Oh why that is a beautiful name." Dib said. "Almost as beautiful as mine."

"ITS NOT BEAUTIFUL!" Gaz said.

"GAZ I'LL BE LOOKING FOR THOSE CAMERAS TONIGHT!" Dib said.

 _One cheesey montage with a time skip to Doomsville Middle Skool_

"Ah Grenda." Dib said while daydreaming.

"DIB!" Ms. Bitters yelled. "YOUR HAPPY! YOUR NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HAPPY!" She said.

"But I met thee most amaaaazing girl last night!" Dib said.

"I remember my first crush." Ms. Bitters said, it was salt, she said the words to it, "We're both pretty salty salt shaker. Why are we resisting?" she said.

Zim laughed very lightly so Dib wouldn't find out his plan, "Ah foolish Dib, that girl is probably messing with you." Zim said.

"HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT ZIM!?"

"Because you're." Zim spun his finger around the spot he would have had ears if he had them. Everyone in the class laughed.

"I'll show you Zim. I'LL ASK HER TO GO TO SKOOL AND PROVE YOU WRONG ZIM!"

Zim's eyes widened, "Don't be silly, she might go to another school? She might have to do FILTHY stuff there." Zim suggested.

"Zim this is the only Middle School for miles, she obviously comes here, and that means I CAN FIND HER TODAY!"

Zim's eyes widened more. How was he supposed to find a girl named Grenda, had a high-pitched voice, and liked Dib. "I'm probably going to have use my BRILLIANT! Disguises in order to fool the-Diiiib."


	3. Some Title For a Chapter

**A/N: Word up kids, this is Poop Derp. Just kidding. Anyway I should've gotten to this earlier but the Anti-Gaz oneshot, the new chapter of the second season of Dark and Insane Adventures with Zim and Others, like it's just too tempting. Anyway let's do dis, *insert flashy music that can be used for raves.***

 **Invader Derp Productions Persents**

 **"Noobs of Noobcraft, Part 3"**

 **(Don't ya do it, you know what I mean.)**

After Skool, Zim went into his base, "GIR I need to get a disguise to trick Dib." Zim announced as he went in. GIR walked into the living room with an apron around his waist and a tray of donuts.

"I MADE DOOONUTS!" GIR said.

"GIR we need to focus! I need a disguise that will make me stunning in Dib's eye." Zim marched down into his lab, he looked through all of the costumes he could choose, he chose a disguise with apricot crayon scribbles all over Zim's skin, a crappy red haired wig, and a purple dress. "THIS IS BRILLIANT!" Zim said.

 _Dib's Nice Little House_

Dib had called "Grenda," and was ready. Zim opened the door, Dib stroked his chin, "Hmmmmm..." Zim was hoping he wouldn't find out. "OK let's go."

"So-" Zim then noticed he wasn't making his voice high pitched, "Tell me about yourself Dib?"

"Well I like paranormal." Dib crossed his fingers hoping that "Grenda" wouldn't think he was crazy.

"That's um... interesting I guess?" Zim said. Dib got closer to Zim, Zim pushed him away, "TOO CLOSE!"

 _Some Cheap but Somewhat Fancy Place and Such_

"This is a nice date we're-" Zim coughed because his vocal cords were tired of speaking in a high pitched voice, "having."

"I think so to Grenda." Dib responded, he then took a bite of his meal.

A man came up with a bill, "Your check."

"I'l-"

Then Dib interrupted, "I'll pay." He then checked the bill, "Ok maybe YOU can?"

Zim digged into his pocket "I have just about 20$." The meal was 20.01$.

"YOU HAVE ONE CENT SHORT! NOW YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY, by cleaning a few dishes." The man said.

Zim and Dib fell to their knees and said, "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

 _Back at Zim's Base_

Zim took off his wig as he came back in, "Master why are you late! AND WAFFLEZ!"

"I was one cent short, GIR you need to loot the humans pockets more." Zim said.

"Sorry." GIR said, "waaaaaaafleeeezz?"

"GIR the last time I ate waffles I had an upset squeely spooch the whole night!"

 _10 days of Zim bending Dib to his will later_

By now Dib was in love with "Grenda," to the point where he was daydreaming fantasies of her.

"And that class is why... I forgot what we were talking about," then her teacher eye scanner activated, she scanned Dib, and the scanner marked him as "Looking Out of the Windower."

"Aaaaah." Dib said.

"DIB!" Ms. Bitters said.

Reality hit Dib's head, symbolically, symbolically if you were wondering, "Yes?" Dib asked.

"Focus." Ms. Bitters said.

Dib folded his hands and Ms. Bitters went back to teaching. Things like this happened all the rest of the week. On Friday Dib was playing NoN with Zim.

"Hey Dib." Zim said.

"Yes Grenda?" Dib asked.

"Maybe you can tell me the combination number to your room?"

"Of course! It's 989750. Why you ask?" Dib said.

"No reason, no reason at all..." Zim said.

"Well I got to go, cya." Dib said. He then disconnected to the game, "Ah man it cracks me up that Zim thinks that he has fooled me, no one likes me! Wow that sounded much better in my mind, once Zim puts in the wrong combination, man will I do something! Maybe stop talking to myself."

 _To be continued_


	4. The Endening

**A/N: Should've gotten to this sooner, but notherless I wanted to do Dark and Insane Adventures with Zim and Others. But anyway I really can't say anything else so lets begin this.**

 **Invader Derp Productions Persents**

 **"Noobs of Noobcraft, Part 4"**

 **(WHY YOU KEEP TEXTING!?)**

 _Dib's House_

"I'm almost ready." Dib said.

Zim knocked on the door.

"Hey Grenda! How you doing?" Dib greeted "Grenda."

"I'm doing fine." Zim said, "Man I'm really thirsty, could you get me some tea?"

"Sure, 'Grenda.'" Dib said, he walked into the kitchen, then Zim sneaked upstairs.

"Now to enter the room combination code." Zim put in the combination. "WHAT THE- WRONG!?"

Then a dark figure with a bat suddenly came behind Zim and hit him so hard it knocked him out.

 _2 Minutes Later_

Zim's PAK made him regain conscious and he was greeted by Dib.

"Fascinating Dib that you we're able to knock me out! I never knew you had such strength!" Zim said.

"Actually, I uh, had Gaz do it. I didn't feel confident enough that I'd be able to hit you hard enough to knock you out."

 _Down in the Living Room_

"Making money." Gaz said with the 20 dollar bill Dib gave her.

 _Back up in Dib's Room_

"Seriously though I've seen her knock me out in a single punch before. Anyway, Zim. I knew you we're tricking me from the start, well, I was definetly sure when I saw the disguise." Dib said.

"HOW!? MY DISGUISE! IT'S BRILLIANT!"

"No, that hair is completely unrealistic and that apricot crayon drawn all over your skin. I've seen better camoflauge from a peacock in a city."

"Well Dib you were able to have your scary sister knock me out, see through my disguise? What will you do now?"

"Oh I've called a few friends, don't worry, they're REAL nice."

Then a policeman walked into the room. "THERE'S THE PERVERT!"

"Eh?" Zim said.

Then the policemen pulled out their batons and started beating up Zim.

"AAAAAH!"

"And everything turned out good in the end." Dib said

 **Authors Notes**

 **Well that was an interesting story. I'm going to be doing a much bigger project next time. Sorry that the ending was a bit short. I really wanted to end the story and get it out of the way. Anyway get ready for my next project folks!**


End file.
